My view and thoughts on everything!

"she was the only leader who could spell ‘existentialism’....he made Vladimir Putin and our Johnny streak down the corridors of the Intercontinental Hotel while singing ‘achy break heart’! At last the APEC circus has departed good ol’ Sydney town and we can now get back to normal. All bar one of the leaders have paid their $4 for an airport trolley, loaded up their luggage, submitted the departure tax and have left Australia with their cuddly koalas, kangaroos and beef jerky. The leader who has pulled the short straw, however, is the Canadian PM who has stayed on for more talks with our PM John Howard, and also to collect more Australian soft toys (I recommend the wombat!). The main conversational topic around the hot water urn in most offices revolves around what happened during the last couple of days of the APEC summit. The reason for this is that all the meetings were held behind closed doors. Well, my avid readers, I can divulge what went on as I was privy to some confiden...

"I thought Aussie tucker meant a Big Mac, fries and a shake! However, I was sadly wrong.......the New Zealand PM would hug and kiss all her APEC buddies, grab her Aussie bikini, before being escorted out by a beefy security guard. We are now just over halfway through the great APEC junket and Sydney is indeed a strange place to be in. Not only are there a lack of people in the CBD but movement is severely hampered by the motorcades that are roaring through the city streets. I even half expect to see Jack Bauer on his mobile phone protecting the President from the latest danger. Naturally, Dubya has his flotilla of security following him everywhere he goes. I assume they even follow the President to the bathroom! Let’s hope that George hasn’t been eating any Indian food lately! Actually, the President’s food intake has already been sliced and diced (literally) by food nutrition experts across Australia. A quick search on the internet will reveal all about Dubya’s dietary intake. Fr...

"all leaders will be given Speedos (budgie smugglers) and thongs....seeing John or George in a taffeta dress and high heels certainly won't do much for the economy" This week Sydney is in 'lockdown' mode. It is one of those nowadays terms which simply means 'restrictions of movement'. It's quite interesting really as in the past few years buzzwords like 'lockdown' and 'collateral damage' have entered mainstream vocabulary. I am sure there are many more but at present these two seem to be the most common. The reason that Sydney is in 'lockdown' is because the Australian Government, led by John Howard, are hosting the APEC forum. I am not going to go into what APEC stands for, but in layman's terms it is a bunch of world leaders from a number of Pacific nations who come to a host country for a junket, eat lots of food, drink lots of alcohol, get spoilt and are gifted a ridiculous local outfit to wear! Aside from the Junket I b...