My view and thoughts on everything!

"why would you want to know what a suitcase weighs in Milton Keynes? The answer is probably the same as in Leamington Spa or Wagga Wagga!...I can assure you that our thoughts are wide and varied. In brief it would revolve around beer, birds and footy!" The other day while having a cup of chai (Indian spiced tea to the uninitiated) I decided to look at some of the statistics surrounding my blog. I do this periodically as it's always good to see where people are viewing my blog from, and also how they came upon my epic tomes of everyday life. One statistic that really caught my eye, well both of them really, was the 'keyword analysis' stats. This is the wording used by an Internet user to stumble across my blog. Some of the word searches were quite interesting in their own right. So here are a selection of searches undertaken by readers of my blog: Weighing my suitcase in Milton Keynes - When I saw this I didn't know what to make of it! I know that Milton ...

"I need you to buy some stockings" Now my head was spinning? why would I need stockings???...It was at that stage that some Gordon Ramsay style language spewed forth from my mouth and the GPS was turned off" Weddings are great events. For the family and friends that attend the marriage service it truly is a moment of magic. However, for the bride, groom or bridal party it can be a very stressful time. The following is an account of what happened to me as I attended the wedding of my wife's best friend in Sydney. My wife was the Matron of Honour and my daughters were Flower Girls. The day before the wedding my wife informed me that we would need to get up early on Saturday morning so that my daughters and herself could have their hair and makeup done in preparation for the big event (and I don't mean the local footy match either). I considered this and said "no problems" thinking that we could leave home at 8 o'clock and arrive at the bride's hou...

"I decided to take a swig of beer every time Gordon Ramsay emitted the offensive word...for the next 10 minutes Gordon Ramsay did not swear once! I was truly amazed" Last week I decided to watch Ramsay's Kitchen Nightmares as it is one of my current fave shows. I like it as I admire his passion for all things cooking. Anyway, this show is where world renowned chef (and former soccer player) Gordon Ramsay helps turn around an under-performing restaurant. The main causes of this are generally bad food, bad management and even in cases the menu itself. Big Gordon is so popular in Australia that up until recently he had his show on Australian television three nights in a row! As some of you would know, 'Chef Ramsay' likes to use the 'F' word more often than Ozzy Osbourne! I decided to undertake a test to see how many times the 'F' word was used in one show. Rather than counting the swear words I decided to take a swig of beer every time Gordon Ram...

“It could be said, however, that one of our greatest antiquities is indeed the Australian Prime Minister!….. or launching a midnight military style raid on Auntie Ethel’s home looking for that one item that could be worth a lot of money” During the past seven days or so I have had the pleasure (or not) of having watched a large number of television shows. I often find it amazing, that when I am in England, how the variety of programmes differ from that which is seen in Australia. For example, there are more quiz and cooking shows in England than compared to Australia. Chefs such as Jamie Oliver, Gordon Ramsay and Ainsley Harriott are far better known than members of the British government! In fact, every single day of the week there would have to be at least two or three cookery shows on offer to us the viewer. Obviously, the public must be following the recipes judging by the widening waistlines of the vast majority of Britons! However, there is another category of shows that are extr...